My Entrepreneur Diary. Victoria E Strange

My Top 5 tips to help Defeat Imposter Syndrome and Achieve Success

• Victoria • Season 1 • Episode 20

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Ever felt like you're just one step away from being found out as a fraud? You're not alone. Join me in this candid episode where I share my own battles with imposter syndrome, from launching my first business to starting this very podcast. Learn actionable strategies to confront self-doubt, beginning with the simple but powerful act of acknowledging your achievements. We'll also discuss practical methods to challenge negative thoughts and find evidence to dispel your unfounded fears. Plus, discover why talking about your feelings with trusted friends or mentors can help normalize your experience and diminish the power of imposter syndrome.

Striving for perfection can be a dangerous trap. Over the past year, I realized the toll it was taking on my productivity and mental health. I share how shifting from a perfectionist mindset to setting realistic, achievable goals has led to more satisfying and productive weeks. You'll hear practical tips on breaking down larger goals into manageable steps, helping you build confidence and fully recognize your capabilities. Finally, I wrap up with heartfelt advice on embracing self-kindness, reminding you that taking care of yourself is crucial for success. Let's combat imposter syndrome together and move forward on our entrepreneurial journeys with renewed confidence and a balanced mindset!

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Speaker 1:

Hello everyone and welcome back to another episode of my Entrepreneur Diary. So it's Monday, it's a fresh week, it's a blank page and this is your chance. Wherever you are in the world, whatever you're doing, whatever time, whatever day it is, this is your chance to make your time yours, make your time count. So what are we talking about today? Well, we are talking about imposter syndrome. Now, that's a really big subject and you know, I've got to be honest, it's a bit of a pain in the butt. Subject, isn't it? Because no one likes imposter syndrome. It's horrible but unfortunately, many of us get it.

Speaker 1:

I have definitely had it. I have had it in my personal life and I have definitely had it in my business. And if you don't know what imposter syndrome is, it's effectively imposterous thoughts of maybe you're not good enough, or that wouldn't happen to me, or I'm not good enough to do this. It's like you have a little gremlin sitting on your shoulder telling you that you can't do what you want to do, and really that's the crux of it. That is what imposter syndrome is. Now, I've definitely had it. As I say, you know, I think when I first started my first business, I just thought no, I can't do this, it's not, this is not going to happen. And yet it did. And yet it did. And when I first started the podcast as well, I really wanted a podcast and I just thought, right, I'm gonna have a podcast. But there was always that little thing of, oh, it's not gonna work and no one's gonna listen. Why would anyone listen to me? And of course you know I proved proved if I can get my words out I proved that imposter syndrome wrong, because actually my podcast is doing okay and I have now got a podcast. So it's just one of those things I think that happens when you know actually you can achieve your goals, you can do it, you are good enough, but unfortunately sometimes you can experience that, oh yeah, but I don't know, maybe I'm not good enough, and of course, actually that's a load of crap and you are good enough. So I thought, right, what are my top tips? My top five tips for beating imposter syndrome? And I'm going to tell you what they are, and these are not tips that I've just plucked out of the air, these are ones that I've actually used myself and it really helps. So tip one acknowledge your achievements. You can do this anyway.

Speaker 1:

Keep a record of your accomplishments. I can't even say that word. What am I like? Keep a record of your accomplishments, big and small. By the way, you have to keep that record of all your goals, big and small, and then reflect on your successes and remind yourself of your capabilities and the progress that you've made.

Speaker 1:

Now, how many times I want you to ask yourself how many times have you achieved things and not given yourself that recognition? I have definitely done that and I've coasted along and I've done this and I've done that, and then I've achieved this, and then maybe it was something that I was learning and it really it took a lot to learn something. It definitely has happened to me. It was something well, in fact, it's happened quite a few times where you know, there's certain things I've had to learn and I really honestly did not think that I would be able to do it, and that's where that imposter syndrome came in and I did it, I actually did it, but then I never recognized it and it took for me to then get, I don't know, quite a few months down the line and think, oh, hang on a minute, I did that, I actually achieved that. So that is why it is so important to acknowledge your achievements because by acknowledging your, give yourself that pat on the back or I don't know, maybe you want to reward yourself big or small, but whatever you do, you must recognise it. It's so important.

Speaker 1:

Now, tip two challenge those negative thoughts. You know, when the self-doubt creeps in like it does, consciously challenge those thoughts. Ask yourself if there's real evidence to support your doubts or if they're just unfounded fears, which I think nine times out of ten they are just unfounded that little gremlin sitting on your shoulder just giving you lots of reasons why you can't do it and why you shouldn't do it. I mean, how many times have you had something that you wanted to do, but and do you know what? You really wanted to do it? With every fibre of your being, you were like right, I'm going to do this, I'm going to, I'm going to excel in this. And then all you could do after that was think of a million reasons of why you shouldn't do it. But actually, if you put all of that effort in that you put into thinking why you couldn't do it, if you put that into why you should do it, wow, you've beaten that imposter syndrome there. And then, because what you have done is you have challenged the negative thoughts, you have challenged those imposter syndrome.

Speaker 1:

Imposter syndrome or the imposter syndrome, should I say? So, tip three, talk about it Now in all honesty. It's good to talk and I think if you can talk about your feelings with a friend or someone close to you then then I think it really can be very, very benefiting. So talk about it, share your feelings with trusted friends, as I said, mentors or colleagues, and you'll likely find that others have experienced similar feelings which you know can actually help normalise your experience and reduce that power of imposter syndrome.

Speaker 1:

You know, I remember all the way throughout my life, personally and professionally, when I've had, you know, imposter syndrome and I've said, you know, maybe, to my mum oh, I'm feeling this. And the thing is, you know, I know that I shouldn't be feeling this, but it's really negative. And once I speak to someone about it, all of a sudden it's very cliche, but it halves it. It halves it straight away. It halves that negative feeling. It halves that negative feeling and then you know, if I've got a problem that you know, maybe in my business, and I'm thinking, well, not so much even a problem, but just something that maybe I it's probably normally a goal that I want to do or something that I want to do, and then there's there's that thought of no, you can't do it. And then when you speak to someone, they're like no, of course you can do it, why would you even think that? And then again, you know, going back to tip three, it is about challenging those negative, imposter syndrome thoughts and also by doing that and then by talking about it, which is tip three, it really does help. It really really does a healthy, successful mindset, a mindset that is conditioned for success because you know what you can do it. You've just got to have that self-belief.

Speaker 1:

Tip four focus on growth and not perfection, or perfection, should I say? I think, I just I think I just changed the word there Focus on growth and not perfection. So true, isn't it? Now, how many of you who are listening to this have tried to get everything perfect? And, let's be honest, we have our own level of perfect, don't we? But there isn't one type of perfect, and really what that means is there isn't, there's no such thing as perfect. And so therefore, you know, embrace the idea that learning and growth are actually, they're continuous processes, you know, instead of striving for that's that word, again, I don't know why I can't say that word today instead, instead of striving, you know, for perfection, aim for progress and celebrate your journey of improvement, because and I've being on the level with you I have always well, not so much now, well, actually not at all now, but there was a time when I just wanted everything to be perfect and actually it wasn't going to be perfect. So, if you focus on growth, things become your own type of perfect, because you're out there, you're growing. You're not working to be perfect, you're working to grow. So remember that work to grow, work. Don't work to be perfect, because it just doesn't work. Do you know? I haven't told anyone this, and actually I haven't told anyone this. So I'm now going to tell you all, all of you who listen to this podcast all over the world.

Speaker 1:

For the past oh, I don't know maybe nine to twelve months I don't do this now because I realized it was wrong but I'd get to a Monday or get to Sunday night actually not Monday and I'd think, right, I'm going to have a perfect week. And then I'd get to the end of the week and my week wouldn't have been perfect and I don't know how I adapted this thought process Don't even ask me where it come from, but that's what I had been doing. I'm going to, yeah, actually being really honest. It was only a few weeks ago that I actually realised that this was actually a very poor thought process of mine to do, because, of course, I was getting to the end of every week and it wasn't perfect because I had made things impossible for myself. You know, I'd put things, you know I'd put on my calendar everything that I needed to do and actually, you know, I wasn't able to do that and, of course, that was fine. I could move it to the next week, but then I would still get to the Friday and think, oh okay, well, that week wasn't perfect, perfect and what I realized was actually having a perfect week was never, ever gonna happen. It just wasn't. It wasn't gonna happen.

Speaker 1:

But actually, maybe working towards and as I was going through the week just being the best that I could be and doing things to the best of my ability, but not being perfect was such a it was so, more it was, it was better. I can't even get my words out. It was just better. And then, all of a sudden, my weeks were good because I didn't put this pressure on myself. Um, so you know what, going back to tip four focus on growth and not perfection, because there is no such thing as perfection there really really ism.

Speaker 1:

So tip five set realistic goals. I suppose it's very much like what I just said. I think the goals that I was setting myself were completely unrealistic, you know, and and you know, it wasn't just business goals, it was things like my cleaner resigned because she decided that she was, she was going to look after her parents. So you know, I haven't had a cleaner in a while. And so I was getting to the week and I was like, right, this house is going to be, it's going to be like a show house by the end of the week.

Speaker 1:

Oh my God, now that I say it, how the hell was I going to do that? It just was not going to happen. But now I'm like you know what? Ok, this week I need to focus on a couple of rooms in the house. I mean, no joke, if you come into my house, you you would say, oh, wow, it's, it's really clean, it's really tidy and it is. But it's what you feel in yourself, isn't it? And um, yeah, I now kind of look at it in a very different way and I'm like you know what, by the end of the week I'll just have those couple of things done, and it's so much more better. It's so much more better, it's so much more easy to, you know, take on and actually get done.

Speaker 1:

So, set realistic goals, you know, break down your goals into manageable steps and then, by setting and achieving small, realistic objectives and goals, you can build confidence over time and see that you're more capable, confidence over time, and see that you're more capable, much more capable, of more than you initially thought. And this is my way of beating imposter syndrome. There's no promises here. You might do all of this and it might not be your imposter syndrome, but you know what it beat mine. So I reckon, yeah, I reckon, if you followed these tips, I think it would.

Speaker 1:

If you have imposter syndrome, it would give it a good beating. So that is that. That is that for this week. I don't know what's wrong with me today. I can't get my words out. That's that for this week, or that's it for this week, should I say whatever you are doing this week, have a great week. Do not put too much pressure on yourself, because if you're anything like me, if you put too much pressure on yourself, you don't succeed and everything becomes a little bit, a little bit more difficult. So be kind to yourself as well. Have a great week, everyone, take care, and I will speak to you next week.